Colombo

I'm bored to death of trite travel writing with descriptions of foreign traffic jams, toilets and cultural misunderstandings. But here I go....


The Mount Lavinia Hotel is a stark contrast to the world outside: trucks spewing fumes dodging eachother, tuk-tuks and daring pedestrians; limbless beggars and half-constructed buildings. It was built by one of Ceylon's English governors, for his local mistress. Bits of "The Bridge Over the River Kwai," were filmed here. It’s nothing, if not a nice place to rest your head after a long flight.

A train heading straight to the city leaves from just outside the hotel, taking it costs about 10 cents. Of course, we missed the train, and grabbed a cab. This was the first in a series of confrontational business transactions. Of course, once we got through that, we learned the cabby had four kids--two boys, two girls. He dropped us off at Majestic City, one of Colombo's biggest shopping malls. The smell of sweet-popcorn wafted through the air-conditioned atmosphere alongside club-volume techno-music. Teenagers and families alike strolled through. As a rule I hate shopping malls, but this one had its own special charm.

Our first tuk-tuk ride took us to Colombo's fort, and to a travel agent that didn't exist. So on foot, we searched the city for an umbrella and walked to the "World Trade Centre" to make some adjustments to our return flight. The agent we spoke with sat in front of a computer but sent our request to London via "telex," which is apparently the thing before email.

Our second tuk-tuk driver proved to us that traffic laws do exist in Colombo, and that they are enforced. The traffic ahead of us seemed never-ending, and if I'd had the chance, the balls, I would've skipped ahead of it too. I guess he thought he could get away with driving on the wrong side of the road, but I think his near-collision with a motorcycle cop was the first mistake. Eventually, the cops did manage to make him pull over. They peeked in the back and informed us, the passengers, "He dangerous."

After a long chat, the driver came back and drove us to the train station. He said something about going to court…